I can't complain about things on Facebook or else people would have a pussy fit and start a personal attack against me on my status update. So, here you go.
1. I fucking hate people that don't know the definition of awkward.
"That awkward moment when my cat jumped on my lap."
Am I the only one that sees pure stupidity in these statements? Am I missing a really bad joke?
2. I hate that awkward moment when everyone wonders why my siblings and I look nothing alike.
See what I did there?
3. I hate when people freak out in the beginning of a very ripe, fresh relationship and want an answer to something like this: "WELL DO YOU FUCKING LOVE ME AND WANT TO BIRTH MY CHILDREN OR DO YOU JUST HATE ME SO MUCH THAT YOU NEVER WANT TO SEE ME AGAIN!?"
Patience is a virtue. Patience is also a big, bad bitch.
4. I hate people who say they hate reading.
I bet you can still read between the lines.
5. I hate it when people tell me I over-analyze things.
At least I have a brain. That functions. And has depth. This is a horrible argument to back up that statement, but I don't care. Just never tell me that, or I'll pluck your toes off and make that horrible scraping noise with a fork on a plate until you go insane.
I'll leave you with five so that I don't get too much hate mail (From my hundreds of followers, that is... hahahaha. Funny joke).
This makes me forget about all the things I hate and instead I piss my pants laughing: