My Thanksgiving went a little like this:
Starve until mid afternoon, smelling all the food being prepared and not being able to eat until the complete feast is ready
Drink wine on empty stomach, get buzzed
Finally feast. Get so full, you can only move your ass to the couch (in my case, the floor) and lay in misery for an hour only able to get enough energy to text someone back
Get up from being turkey drunk and feel rejuvenated
Make way back to kitchen, feast more, mostly on dessert that you didn't have room for before
Lay back down
Time in-between eating becomes less as the night goes on
Spend hours eating and preparing for Black Friday Assault
Eleven thirty: gather shopping warriors in family and begin the adventure
Wait outside Kohls, doors open at midnight. Watch drunk kid jostle his junk in front of man in car
Doors open to Kohls, the chaos begins
Spend five minutes darting to the things on your list to get at store, then find line
Line is in the back of the store, Wait in line for an hour to pay
Exhaustion takes you after first ten minutes of waiting
... Two more stores to go.
3 a.m.: Fall asleep, having dreams of British Literature class being held at a store during Black Friday
I'm never doing that again. But, I did get a cool memory foam floor mat for my bathroom.
Cheers to those partying Pilgrims and Indians all those years ago.
